Chapter 3: Bad Girl
Translator: Skythewood
Editor: Hiiro
— I still remember how everyone first met.
We were on our way to the second round of the Officer Cadets selection exams, the six of us coincidentally took the same ship. Others might think that this coincidence was the beginning of the 「Knights Corp」.
However, the truth was different. That meeting was a result of many intentional actions. One of which was the Imperial Army— I couldn’t say for certain, but Yatori-san and Torway-san were intentionally arranged to be on the same ship by the army. They probably felt that meeting on the ship before the exam would help them foster a better relationship then meeting at a competitive venue… Considering the bad blood between the Igsem faction and Remeon faction back then, it wouldn’t be strange for them to go that far.
Next was Her Majesty… No, she was still Her Highness Chamille Kitra Katjvanmaninik back then. She boarded the ship to interact with Yatori-san and Torway-san who had a bright future ahead of them. Having spent more time with her, I realized that she already had a revolution as her goal— or rather, a hope for destruction.
Third would be my intention. The schemes of Haroma＝Patrenshina, a sleeping agent who infiltrated the place to serve the Kioka army’s strategic objective.
My mission requires a lot of patience. Simply put, I have to rise through the ranks of the Imperial army as Haroma Becker, then relay the intel I could get on virtue of my status back to Kioka. This was a typical long term mission, but the goal the high command set for me was a tall order, compared to my peers. Their condition was — 「Only commence action after reaching Field-Grade Officer rank」.
Just getting to the starting point took me lots of preparatory work. First, I spent two years solidifying my foundation in order to participate in the Officer Cadet Selection Exams. I needed to create the Imperial citizen Haroma Becker, my cover identity.
To earn my qualifications in the medics test, I transferred to my alma mater Mikhailah nursing specialist school and studied for an entire year. My history before my enrollment wasn’t entirely fictional either. Haroma Becker was a real girl. This was all handled by an agent who infiltrated ahead of time— They targeted her and her family who didn’t submit any death certification after dying of illness, and replaced her entire household with spies. She didn’t have five younger brothers, but this was easy to arrange since it was common for farmers to not officially register all their children to avoid taxes.
After firming up the identity of Haroma Becker, I finally participated in the Officer Cadets Selection Exams. I only applied for the first two years but didn’t participate, because the preparations to pass the background checks after the first round of exams weren’t done yet. And the real records of failing twice will raise my credibility after I make the grade. This felt a little ironic to me.
After all those preparations, I finally boarded that ship and met with everyone.
My first impression back then was that all five of them had unique personalities. First was Yatori-san— I wasn’t exaggerating that I felt she was more outstanding than anyone else participating in the Selection Exams. How do you raise such a perfect person? That was unfathomable to me. I only learned a part of the reasons later on.
Next was Matthew-san. His face when he was teased by Yatori-san and Ikuta-san left a deep impression on me, and I felt he was an easygoing person. He was hardworking and proud, the type who others would want to support, even though that wasn’t his intention. I built a cordial relationship with him too.
Third was Torway-san. He was excellent, but the greatest difference between him and Yatori-san was his gentle character that didn’t suit the military. His selfless personality had always been a flaw, but after harsh training and an internal struggle, he was now working to become a person that could change the way war was fought. I deeply respect his attitude.
The Fourth was the Princess. She might be young, but she was a bright and dignified kid. She was the last person I met, but I have heard about her long ago. Because the person who influenced the Princess’ trip to Kioka the most, was also the person who recruited me to be a spy. Because of that, I felt a sort of kinship towards her… and as I spent time with her, this feeling turned into a firm belief— This girl has never been loved.
Finally, the fifth person… That’s right, it’s Ikuta-san. I didn’t have any prior knowledge about him, and was surprised when he hit on me right after we met for the first time. The thing that caught his attention first was very unique— there weren’t many men who would compliment a woman he met for the first time by saying how rough her hands were from doing housework. Most would comment on her looks, her dressing or her figure. He wasn’t serious about the Selection Exam, not showing any ambition to make it big as a soldier at all. Who was he and why was he there… I only learned the truth a long time later.
What happened next was unexpected. After staying in the cabin for a short while, the ship ran into a seareef, and the six of us were thrown overboard. When we made it to land after much hardship, we found ourselves in Kioka territory. We got caught in a big crisis on our way to the Selection Exams.
… But I was acting strange.
Could we return to the Empire? Would we live or die? We were facing such a big crisis, but I thoroughly enjoyed the time we worked together to overcome the obstacles in our way.
This was the first time I experienced such a warm relationship, where the entire group hoped for each other’s safety, with the goal of surviving as a group. The espionage training I received in Kioka prioritized the concealment of emotions and how to toy with the feeling of others. As for a fellow trainee she could call a comrade… Thinking back, I couldn’t answer for certain.
In any case, although the members just got to know each other, the 「Knights Corp」 had incredible teamwork. Yatori-san’s leadership, Ikuta-san’s wits and humour, Torway-san’s kindness… all these played an important part. It would spoil the mood to think about all these as a scheme by someone. I prefer to explain this as our gears just happen to fit together.
No one in this group tried to bully me, deceive me, dump their work on me, or rob things that were precious to me. Everyone was kind and gentle.
Ahh— I wanted to be loved by this group. I didn’t want to be detested by them.
So I will be a good girl. I thought that I would always be a good girl.
Why was I staying in the Empire? Why did I have to rise through the ranks in the military?
I probably forgot most of this during that time.
＊
「.. Solork.」
This was one of the most hallowed places in the palace— The Grand Courtyard of the Holy White Hall. The high ranking officers prostrating before the throne were all silent, and the Empress asked with trembling lips.
「Is this really fine?」
The way she seeked consent from someone didn’t fit her peerless status. Because she knew very well that bestowing the highest honour in this ceremony was worthless in this man’s eyes.
「There’s nothing fine or not fine with this— we are just going through a fixed process.」
The youth ignored traditional protocol and stood before the Empress, speaking with her intimately as usual. As it wouldn’t be surprising for him to skip the entire ceremony, the current situation was already a big compromise from him.
「I will be the same man before and after this ceremony. Don’t think too much and just get on with it.」
「... I understand. Well then...」
Chamille resolved herself and took a deep breath. After pausing for a few seconds, she said formally:
「In the name of Chamille Kitra Katjvanmaninik, The 28th Empress of the Katjvarna Empire, I hereby issue a decree to Imperial soldier Ikuta Solork.
In recognition of your outstanding strategies and flexible imagination, and your great accomplishments at such a young age— from this moment on, I appoint you as the Field Marshal of the Katjvarna Empire. May you perform to the utmost of your abilities and guide our armies to victories.」
「Okay～— I humbly accept this position.」
It wasn't just Matthew, Torway and Sazarf. Ikuta’s frivolous answer made all the officers in attendance and the people who knew him smile wryly. When Ikuta received his edict, the Palace’s martial officers came to either side of him to switch his rank epaulette. They took five whole minutes to change it out before retreating to the side. Ikuta, who had partially changed to his new uniform, turned to Chamille.
「— See. Nothing changed.」
The youth said with a shrug. The Empress smiled and replied.
「... And also—」
When they heard the lines that weren't part of the ceremony, some of the attendees looked confused. But the two of them continued, as if to show that this was the real main event.
「To honour her loyalty and achievements, I bestow your other half, Yatorishino Igsem, with the same position.」
With that, Chamille placed her hand on the saber by her waist, and Ikuta held the sheath of the short sword in his palm. They closed their eyes with complicated emotions in their hearts. The youth cast his gaze down and said softly with regards to the honour given to her:
「This is what you deserved… Accept this, Yatori.」
「— So it finally turned out this way, huh.」
After the ceremony, the soldiers in attendance left the Holy White Hall, and gathered in a drawing room in a corner of the palace. There wouldn’t be a celebration party today, and it would be held on another day. Ikuta might think this was a hassle, but announcing the appointment of the youngest Field Marshal in Empire history had deep political significance.
「Sigh, I can finally shed the load on my shoulder. Since the Northern Unrest, I have been wondering how long I can stay as your superior officer. Fufufu… I will address you as Field Marshal Sir from now on and mercilessly push all the troublesome matters to you.」
Sazarf said with a gloomy smile. The woman beside him interjected.
「Will things really go so smoothly? The relationship between you two won’t change so easily just because he outranks you.」
「Don’t say something so ominous, Lieutenant Colonel Melza… With a reliable guy at the top, I can take it easy now. Isn’t that right?」
「No. Don’t even think about relaxing, you lack awareness of your station. The head of the military being the youngest Field Marshal in history doesn’t mean you can take it slow. Instead, you have to show your warm support as his elder.」
「How can this be...」
「See, you are slouching again. Pull yourself together, Brigadier General Sazarf.」
After the stern lecture by his female adjutant, Sazarf rounded his shoulders depressedly. Torway watched this scene warmly, and suddenly noticed that his friend had been really quiet.
「Ma-kun, you alright...?」
「... Hmm? Oh, I’m fine… I’m just thinking that after all that we have been through, the two of them got there before me.」
Unlike a certain guy who felt no gratitude towards his appointment, being a Field Marshal was a significant matter to the pudgy youth. That was the final goal the pudgy youth set for himself, and this scene hit him in the feels. However— he noticed that the jade-eyed youth just spoke to him and stopped his thoughts.
「Hey Torway… It has been a long while since you took the initiative to speak to me.」
「Huh… I-Is that so?」
「You aren’t aware!? You have been all wound up recently!」
「S-Sorry. I don’t mean to… There’s been a lot of things on my mind, so I can’t spare the attention on conversations...」
「Really now… It’s fine since you are back to normal. Apologize to Haro later, she had been worried about you.」
Matthew said in relief. Shortly after that, Torway saw that the subject of his apology wasn’t here.
「Oh right— where’s Haro-san?」
Footsteps echoed on the smooth marble floor. Patrenshina slipped out of the drawing room without anyone noticing, and thought as she walked along the Palace’s corridor.
— What should I make of the current situation?
She repeatedly analyzed the current situation. She couldn’t afford the time to enjoy idle chatter.
— Kioka successfully rescued Elulufay Tenerexilla. By inciting a large number of Aldera devotees to escape, the distrust towards the Empress had increased by some extent. On the strategic level, this is a resounding success.
She organized her thoughts and turned right at the corner of the passageway, not forgetting to cheerfully greet any bureaucrats she passed by.
— There is only one problem. Ikuta Solork’s return to the frontlines. How will that affect my mission?
That was the core of the question. She carefully analyzed the situation she was in.
— As for the problem of spies, I have not drawn any strong suspicion yet. Otherwise, they would have kept me away from the Empress. However— they might be intentionally letting me act freely so they can monitor me in secret.
Patrenshina wasn’t overly optimistic or pessimistic, doing her best to accurately gauge the risks— but couldn’t come up with an answer. That man was too much of an enigma, so she couldn’t arrive at a good conclusion.
— I have to know what he is thinking.
Memories of her humiliation still fresh, Patrenshina thought about the dark-haired youth’s face as she stopped. She had arrived at the entrance of the room she was going to.
「Your Majesty, it’s me. Is this a good time?」
「—! C-Come in.」
After getting permission, she opened the door and went in. This was one of the few rooms in the vast palace prepared for the Empress to perform her administration duties. Chamille and Ikuta were seated side by side on a large chair big enough for three. They were probably having some alone time after the ceremony.
「Empress Chamille, good day to you. Congratulations on your promotion, Ikuta-san… Oh, should I address you as Field Marshal Sir?」
「Don’t tease me, Haro. And don’t address me by my rank— You want that to be the first order I give as a Field Marshal?」
「Ahaha, that’s just adding unnecessary paperwork. Well then— Ikuta-san, I will be in your care from now on too!」
Patrenshina bowed with a smile. After the small talk about his Field Marshal appointment, she cut to the chase.
「So— Ikuta-san, I want to ask about any progress with Major Yuguni?」
She enquired directly. As the Empress’ closest vassal, she had a reason to be concerned about that. Ikuta answered immediately:
「We are just starting the background checks— but we found some tools in his dorm room in the Central base, which can be used to communicate with his agents. The Major denied the allegations, but his suspicion had gotten deeper.」
「I see… you even found things like that in his quarters.」
Patrenshina looked down sadly when she heard that… But that was just an act. After all, she was the one who planted these tools in Major Yuguni’s quarters.
「However— even if he is the most suspicious, he might not be the only spy. There is a need to perform an internal investigation. How depressing.」
Ikuta complained with a shrug. Even his casual gesture troubled her.
— Is he trying to keep me in check by saying that? No, am I overthinking it...?
Once she started doubting any implied meaning, there would be no end to it. The woman realized she was too sensitive and cautioned herself.
「Regarding the secret reconnaissance mission done by Matthew, Brigadier General Sazarf and you, I only heard the report after the fact, but I’m certain that mission was obstructed and funneled a certain way right from the start… With Major Yuguni’s position, it was possible for him.」
This could be interpreted as Ikuta feeling the spy problem was being solved. After thinking briefly, Patrenshina adjusted her understanding of the situation in a positive direction.
「There’s nothing more retarded then letting paranoia spread inside the military. Please don’t spread what I said just now. Don’t worry about any assassinations— I will take care of it, so please focus on your work.」
「— Okay! I understand!」
She answered energetically in Haro’s unique way. The three of them chatted a while more before leaving the room and returned to the passageway. The girl headed to the drawing room as she thought about things further.
— I didn’t make any mistakes, and they won’t find anything by checking my background. There is still the risk of the agents who came into contact with me during the plan snitching on me. However...
She thought that was impossible. She already has countermeasures set up for this.
— Craig who handled the pilgrimage clothes sales had left the capital. I also inserted other agents into other places… Even if they get caught, I also asked them to say their superior is Major Yuguni. There is little chance of me being suspected.
Patrenshina was extremely cautious. It was her policy to go all out when finding a scapegoat.
— More importantly, the Empress and her vassals are unwilling to consider me a suspect. It should be the same for Ikuta Solork… Way to go, Haro. If not for you, I wouldn’t have infiltrated deep into the Imperial Military.
Patrenshina gave high praises to Haro, who was in charge of their kind side. No matter how outstanding she was as a spy, she couldn’t handle this high difficulty infiltration mission alone. It was because of Haro’s effort in tolling the field of goodwill that helped the seed of betrayal to grow big and strong.
— Since I have to lay low for a while, why not hand control of my body over to Haro?
Since the situation had gotten tedious, this option flashed across her mind. However, the woman refuted that after thinking over it.
— No, the situation is still fluid. I’m still needed.
But the moment she made that decision— a familiar figure appeared around the corner. She grew wary at the sight of the khaki colored robes of the highest ranking bureaucrat.
「...! Chancellor Trisnai —」
「Oh, Major Becker. On your way back after an audience with Her Majesty?」
Trisnai chatted her up casually. This Fox acted mildly when he wasn’t facing a person he was obsessed with, or a target of his scheme. Patrenshina was really glad about that, and carefully observed the villainous minister she had not met for a long time.
— That’s right, this person is here too… He had been lying low, but he won’t stay silent if he learns about Ikuta Solork.
Be it as Haro or as a spy, she had to keep a close eye on the conflict between Ikuta and Trisnai that revolved around the Empress. Patrenshina thought to herself and adjusted her future plans.
「Oh— I remember there’s something I had to do, and need to visit the Empress again.」
「Hmm, let’s go together then. I want to greet Her Majesty too.」
Trisnai followed her, as if he just found a suitable guide. Sensing the unique pressure emitted by the Chancellor from behind, Patrenshina made the trip back.
The moment she entered with the unexpected guest, Chamille stood up with a hateful face.
「Fox...!」
「Imperial Chancellor Trisnai Izanma seeks an audience with Your Majesty. Greetings, Empress Chamille.」
He ignored the Empress’ murderous looks and greeted her, then turned to the man seated beside her.
「Ikuta Sankrei… Troubling, how very troubling.」
Trisnai shrugged with disgust and contempt. Ikuta looked at him in silence.
「Why bother coming back now? After creating the moment of Her Majesty’s awakening, isn’t your job done? If you spend the rest of your life as an invalid in the harem, I can turn a blind eye… But you came back to disrupt Her Majesty’s mind, do you lack any self awareness?」
「You jerk...!」
Chamille immediately reached her boiling point. To her, seeing the dark-haired youth insulted was a thousand times more unforgivable than mocking her. Ikuta gently restrained Chamille from pouncing at him, and used the clutch in his other hand to stand up.
「It’s fine— don’t go around picking fights, Trisnai. I know you think I’m annoying. But leaving that aside, I can provide a lot of practical help, correct?」
The youth ignored the insults and said boldly with determination. He didn’t respond to the taunt and said the answer he prepared ahead of time. Part of the reason for his return was to settle things with this fox.
「Letting the outstanding Empress command the army directly— you told me in the past that is your ideal. Chamille is smart, and has probably lived up to your high expectations. But don’t forget, she is more of a governor than a military expert. It’s too reckless for a 16 year old girl with incomplete military education to go toe to toe with war veterans from Kioka.」
「Oh...?」
「The same goes for you too, military matters should be left to professionals. But Field Marshal Igsem who was in that role left the frontlines after the civil war. Who is the leader of the Imperial army after his departure? General Remeon? Or General Shiba?」
The Fox had the same mask-like smile as he stayed silent. That was only natural since none of the generals listed by Ikuta could lead the Imperial Army.
「Neither of them is the leader. The Imperial army lacks a de facto leader, and Chamille had to take the helm. This is what you wanted, but this is obviously far from ideal. The opponent is the Kioka Republic after all. This incident made it clear that Kioka is a powerful enemy just in terms of warfare alone.」
Probably feeling that there was some merit to hearing Ikuta’s analysis out, Trisnai asked:
「So you are saying if it was you— there is a chance of winning against Kioka?」
「Before asking that, think about what you said two years ago in your attempt to recruit me. You already think highly of me, isn’t that right?」
Ikuta retorted immediately. He knew very well that his usefulness would be the greatest weapon against Trisnai Izanma in future conflicts.
「Since I accepted my appointment, I will perform my role as Field Marshal properly. Well then, let’s go on with the calculation of the pros and cons, which is your forte. The situation is very different from two years ago. Making an enemy out of Kioka, and betting the future of the country on Chamille’s future growth is your negligence as a Chancellor. With that in mind, the pros and cons of me surviving… Are there more upsides than downsides?」
Ikuta raised his hands to mimic a scale. The Fox looked at him in silence for a while— and soon reached a conclusion, then spoke with his usual mask-like smile.
「... Very well then. Before you make a fool of yourself, I will observe for now. To some degree, I’m also regretting that I didn’t prepare a watchdog worthy of Her Majesty. Since you want to take up this post, I won’t mind reevaluating your true worth.」
Deciding to postpone judgement on the youth, Trisnai turned his gaze back to the Empress beside him.
「Most importantly— Your Majesty’s bloodline from the Eternal Sprite Tree has truly awakened. Unlike the time when her true self was still slumbering, your uncouth words won’t mesmerize Her Majesty anymore. Being overly worried would be rude instead.」
The Fox compromised at this juncture. Chamille felt puzzled, wondering if he was biding his time— but this insane man had his own sets of values. He was a fanatic who believed in the absolute superiority of the monarch, and couldn’t accept any lack of respect towards the Empress.
「Your Majesty— you may use him as a dog or a living doll. An Empress can have a male consort or two if you wish so, all the citizens in this Empire are your subjects, so you have every right to do anything you wish with them.」
The Empress’ face darkened bitterly— Ironically, this Fox had complete trust in Chamille, the Empress. The monarch fanatic Trisnai had deep faith in the firm conviction of the girl who killed her father to take the throne, that she would rise to greater height as the Empress. Hence, he wouldn’t easily object to her adoration of Ikuta Solork. Because that would infringe on the Empress’ absolute authority.
However, he would not hesitate to raise any concern without going overboard. The Fox glared at the youth and gave crude advice.
「However— put more thought into choosing the father of your child. This person isn’t someone you should entrust your mystical bloodline with.」
「—What!」
His words made Chamille speechless for a few seconds, before she started shaking with her face flushed. Trisnai respectfully bowed before exiting the room.
Ikuta felt relieved as if a storm had passed, then collapsed onto his seat.
「... Really now. It’s been so long since I spoke with that guy, and the huge difference in values is still making my head spin. Hey, Chamille… Hmm? What’s wrong, your face is beet red.」
「D-Don’t look at me! Don’t look this way!」
Chamille covered her face with both hands and turned away. Ikuta stood up with his clutch, went around to the back of the girl and gently placed his hands on her shoulders. He maintained this position until she slowly removed her hands.
＊
A few days after his appointment as Field Marshal, Ikuta made a rare appearance in the classroom in the Central Base.
「— And so, from today onwards, I, Field Marshal Ikuta Solork, will be your special lecturer. Nice to meet you.」
The Officers Cadets weren’t sure how to react to the youth who greeted them so casually. This was only natural, since the Field Marshal, leader of the Imperial army, was a youth around their age. And he would be teaching them about military tactics, which made things even weirder.
「Relax, as you can see, I’m a young man, so I understand your worries about a guy like me taking on the role of Field Marshal. It will be great if I had just a tiny bit of Field Marshal Igsem’s dignity, but it can’t be helped since I don’t have that.
Alright, since you probably don’t have a good impression of me, I will skip the humble act and get right to the point. Why am I the Field Marshal and standing here as a lecturer? —That’s because i’m better at deploying troops than any one of you, that won’t change even if the scale changes from a section to a division. And I plan to prove that today.」
The classroom was in an uproar. Seeing the fighting spirit in the cadets’ eyes, Ikuta fanned the flames further.
「And so, anyone who wants to challenge me please raise your hand. I will prepare a special prize. If anyone can defeat me, I will make him a Field-Grade officer on the spot.」
Wooaahh～! Cheers erupted in the classroom. After his incitement, this ambitious group of young people who passed the Officer Cadet Selection exams couldn’t restrain themselves anymore. The cadets who wanted to challenge him all raised their hands, and Ikuta looked at them nonchalantly.
「Yes, being enthusiastic is good. But I don’t have time to face everyone today, so let’s pick from the top of the combine rankings. Hmm～ that would be Warrant Officer Kief Laergo, Warrant Officer Maruri Simca—」
He read out the names of the top scorers, and the named cadets stood up gleefully. Ikuta then read out the third name.
「— Warrant Officer Suya Mittokarifu.」
A woman stood up in a corner of the classroom with a clank. She had brown curly hair, freckles, and the corners of her eyes were high, her gaze was filled with unyielding spirit. Her overwhelming fighting spirit silenced the other cadets.
Facing that strong aura that had a hint of murderous intent, Ikuta reeled back a little.
「Uwah— A powerful enemy right from the start.」
＊
As we spent more time together, I got to gradually see all sorts of faces from everyone.
Strong, gentle, beautiful and friendly with a sense of humour, Yatori-san was perfect in my eyes… However, the burdens she had to carry as an Igsem wasn’t something the shallow me could imagine. Thinking back, I couldn’t help a single bit with the problems she faced through her entire life… Wasn’t there something that I could have done? I still thought about that every night.
Torway-san who couldn’t change his gentle nature and developed the concept of snipers. He had to take on the responsibilities as next generation leader in the military, and his troubles as a Remeon was at the end of the spectrum from Yatori-san. He would continue to face countless obstacles in his path, and continue to strive on.
The proud and unyielding Matthew-san. I thought in the beginning that he was in the 「Mediocre faction」 of the Knights Corp like me, but I had to retract that. Unlike me, Matthew-san wasn’t satisfied with being average. To reach Ikuta-san and Yatori-san’s level, he could put in the effort without cutting any corners, he was a great person.
The Princess that I felt closer to since our first meeting was an awkward child like I expected— No, she was more awkward than that. She was a good girl who could empathize with others, but she had the psychological problem of overly hating herself, which twisted her life… I understand, but I couldn’t do anything about it. Because I had a similar mental disorder that made me who I was.
And Ikuta-san. He was the only person who became more of an enigma when I spent more time with him.
People often call him lazy or lecherous, but I didn’t think this was an accurate description of him.
He always complained about not getting to laze off, but he would save more lives with his actions during a crisis.
He would flirt without restraint at the sight of any woman, but would leave the person he cherished the most in a different place.
Indeed, I experienced both situations. Especially the latter… Even I would get mad. Because Ikuta-san would only flirt with me in the group, but put his attention on the other two girls. No— not just that, I was at the bottom of the totem pole even if we include the men. How infuriating.
In the end, the irreplaceable things in Ikuta-san heart were in a completely different place from his infamous lecherous nature. For example, his mother, Yatori-san, or the Princess. The feelings he held towards them might differ, but the women by his side whom he didn’t flirt with were the ones Ikuta-san cherished the most.
… How sly. I understand, but that made it harder for me to hate him, how sly.
I liked the 「Knights Corp」. I was confident that I wouldn’t lose to anyone in that aspect.
However— this made me hold expectations. I couldn’t help yearning the people I loved to love me too, and for them to accept me for who I was.
And of course, I knew that was impossible. I didn’t have the right to be loved. I could only stay with everyone when I’m acting like a good girl. Once my bad girl side gets exposed, everything would be destroyed. However— the moment everything gets destroyed would also be the moment I accomplish my mission.
Repaying trust with the worst betrayal, trampling on their feelings under my shoes… I realized after a few times that even without my position as a spy, Patrenshina and I were such a creature by nature.
Only that person found worth in us. That man who wore his dark blue suit very well… After learning about our true nature, he told us to just stay the same, and showed an unfathomable smile.
「— Patrenshina is probably trying to take revenge for your repeated betrayal, that’s why she is so eager to betray others.」
I see, that made sense. That man smiled… he didn’t admonish us or showed any disgust. Be it the past or in the future, he was the only person who was happy after witnessing our way of life.
「You can just treat betrayal as a job. I can provide the means. And of course, it won’t be work that will weigh on your conscious, but something that will contribute to our society.」
That man was suddenly holding twisted pieces of metal as he spoke, and he fiddled with them before me.
「There’s no need to hold back. Use your unique character and contribute to the development of Kioka. If you do so—」
The two metal tubes clinked together. He then said to us with a kind expression.
「— I will praise you two, and both of you will be good girls to me.」
＊
「Both of you have potential, and you are better than you think.」
The sound of compressed air exploding and crossbow bolts echoed through the air, as Ikuta spoke quietly. The two cadets he was speaking to suffered the first crushing defeat in their life, and collapsed onto the ground.
「Warrant Officer Laergo, you are too greedy in your deployment. I know what you are trying to do, but with this level of training, you should avoid splitting your forces into units smaller than a platoon. As you can see, the soldiers can’t coordinate their attacks well, and got taken out separately. You can ask Major Matthew or Lieutenant Colonel Torway to give you pointers on how best to use a platoon.」
Ikuta listed out the things to improve during this short battle, but how much they could absorb was a different matter.
「Warrant Officer Simca, you are greedy about opportunities. I know you have a good judgement on the right opportunity, and paying attention to the details in a battle is a great asset for officers. However, including your misjudgement in baiting, you have to improve on when to pass on seemingly good opportunities. Build up more experience in future mock battles. If this is a real fight, one mistake will wipe out your whole unit.」
The difference in personalities would show up in their command, he thought as he continued his evaluation. Both the pros and cons stem from the cadets’ personality, and it would take a lot of effort to optimize.
Ikuta watched over the everchanging battle and added:
「One more thing— after you two dropped out, the former non commissioned officer is still fighting on. You are free to feel vexed about this, but don’t be surprised by that. She had experienced live combat under my command. In terms of commanding units smaller than a company, I can vouch for her competency.」
An instructor shouldn’t be biased towards anyone, but it was fine if the subject had shown concrete results. The results of the effort she put into the Military Academy was that worthy of praise.
「You have improved further in the past two years. You really are an amazing girl, Suya.」
「— Keep up the volley fire!」
Suya’s voice shouting commands echoed in the forest. Aside from her own training platoon, she was also directing the troops of her fellow cadets who had been eliminated from action. She had to holler instructions everywhere.
「The firing over there is too uncoordinated! Even without my command, the timing of your fire has to be more in sync一! The number of shots fired might be the same, but the impact is different! You are performing suppressive fire, the goal is to stop the enemy from lifting their heads! If you have the time to search frantically for the enemy, I want you to fire into the woods instead!」
The battlefield was in the east end of the South Wurth Forest, where Ikuta had a mock battle against Captain Sarihasrag. Suya took part as a member of Ikuta’s platoon back then. And now, she was leading her own platoon and standing here as an officer in her own right. That thought made her realize how much time has passed.
「Fire troopers, Luminous soldiers, get ready for melee combat! While we are giving suppressing fire, go around to their flanks and attack! You guys probably can’t judge the right moment, so sprint at top speed on my signal!」
Suya skillfully deployed the three different types of units. She was a Luminous soldier, but could make full use of Fire troopers and Wind Gunners as a commander. The experience she had from her time by the dark-haired youth’s side, and the knowledge she learned in the Military Academy had nurtured her into a competent front line commander.
「Good— Charge! Spray paint bullets on the face of that annoying Field Marshal!」
「An all out attack at a time like this? As expected of Suya, she did a good job leading an ad hoc group.」
In the center of the unorthodox square formation focused on defence, Ikuta smiled at the growth of his disciple. The two platoons under his command had minimal losses, putting up a sturdy defence against her fierce attacks.
「Well, my square formation is sturdy, so we can defend to the end. However—」
While the youth was saying that expectantly, a presence from the forest behind made him turn back. A group parting the foliage were approaching, and soon stepped out of the woods. They had prominent light tanned skin, and held unique blades that curved forward— made out of wood.
「— So you are joining the fray. Well, I’m the one who told you to join in whenever you like.」
「It’s our turn now! Attack!」
Shinnack Tribe Chief Nanak Dar shouted bravely to spur her comrades. Her small unit of twenty Shinnack Tribesmen had also joined this mock exercise. Because of their small numbers, they were given the right to join the fray at any moment, and aid Suya’s group.
「It’s been a while since you last saw the Shinnack Tribe in action, right!? Ikuta, prepare yourself!」
「—Nanak’s unit is joining the fray! They are fighting alongside us!」
When she received news of the Shinnack female warrior’s arrival, Suya, who was acquainted with her, directed the troops to support. The sudden pincer attack forced Ikuta’s formation out of shape.
「Their defences should be weakening— What should I do? What would he have done?」
Suya who had survived numerous battles didn’t relax just because she had the upper hand. The first thing to consider was how she would turn things around if she was the enemy.
「When facing an encirclement, the orthodox tactic is to break out through the enemy’s weakest point. Will you attack the Luminous soldiers in the left flank? Or the Fire troopers in the right flank? No matter which way you go, I will pursue from behind—」
As Suya prepared countermeasures for her opponent’s possible choices, she saw an unexpected change.
「...? Something is wrong, the relative positions are different from just now!」
Suya stared with her eyes wide open. The units flanking the enemy had been squeezed to the front, passing through the enemy formation and colliding chaotically with the Shinnack unit in the centre. They formed a wall, blocking Suya’s unit from having a clear shot at the enemy.
「This is… the two flanking units had been baited there to seal off our line of fire, and he intentionally let Nanak’s unit break through the center so he could escape in the opposite direction...? He is making use of the fact that she would choose to break through at a single point with her smaller unit...!」
The enemy formation that was seemingly bent out of shape from the pincer attack was actually done intentionally to create this situation. When Suya realized that, her shoulders shuddered— Her opponent was absurdly skillful in his command techniques. He confidently used a technique that would wipe out his whole unit with just one misstep.
Witnessing Ikuta Solork’s depth of wisdom for the upteenth time causes a strange emotion to well up in the woman’s heart. That unnamed feeling made Suya Mittokarifu clenched her fists so hard that it hurt.
「... I won’t lose! All units, cease fire, start moving! Go around the left side of our allies and pursue the enemy—!」
The battle continued for more than four hours, and ended at dusk with their defeat.
「... Hah～! Hah～! Hah～!...」
「... Huff～! Huff～! Huff～!...」
Suya and Nanak laid sprawled on the ground side by side. The commander shouldn’t act so slovenly, but the soldiers who watched their battle didn’t fault them for it. Even Warrant Officer Laergo and Warrant Officer Simca could empathize with their exhaustion, and tended to their troops on their behalf.
「Good work. Thanks to you two, this is a meaningful mock exercise.」
Ikuta brought two ice cold bottles over to visit the two women who had burnt out. Suya looked grudgingly at the youth whose breathing was relaxed, in stark contrast with her.
「... You aren’t tired at all, huh. I heard you got a bump leg and can’t command in the front lines anymore...」
「The troops will carry me when we are on the move, which is why I’m not too tired. I can fudge through during mock exercises, but it will be tough for live combat. It’s dangerous if I can’t run by myself during emergencies.」
Ikuta opened the bottle lid and moved it to their mouths as he explained his current situation. He then looked at Suya from an upside down manner, and said with a smile.
「More importantly, you can take on that role for me in the future. Right?」
When she heard that, tears welled up in her eyes. Suya covered her face frantically. She maintained this position and said with trembling lips.
「Don’t get cocky… I wasn’t waiting for you to come back.」
「Yes...」
「I will be fine even if you don’t come back. I won’t feel that I have lost my place, and won’t feel like crying when I’m alone in my room… and I won’t wander around the palace like a fool for a whole day just to catch a glimpse of you or hear you speak.」
Tears flowed down Suya’s cheeks and stained the earth. Her words flowed out just like a broken dam too.
「I already resolved to forget everything, and throw myself into my studies and training until my mind turns blank— and I never thought about showing the results to you. I definitely didn’t think… That if I become better than anyone, then you might come back one day. I didn’t yearn for that at all.」
The youth’s right hand gently touched her moist cheeks. His touch crumbled her defences even further, and Suya whose emotions were in tatters said something hidden deep in her heart.
「— I hate you.」
Ikuta didn’t say anything and kept caressing her face. Cherishing her tenderly, just like how Suya in his arms were, as she put her all into her studies as she waited for his return.
「...... I will allow it just this one time...」
Nanak who was lying beside her mumbled in a voice that only she herself could hear.
「... Yes...」
She woke up on her bed in the morning, and started a new day as usual.
「Good Morning Mia, I want some cold water.」
She brought her Water Sprite partner from the cage to her side, and let Mia add water to the mug by her pillow. She drank the cold water and woke up fresh, and started grooming herself.
— I have to act like a good girl today too? It’s boring if I can’t play pranks～
Since no one was watching, Patrenshina sighed loudly. When she had washed up and put on her blouse, there was a knock on her door.
「—? Okay～I’m opening the door.」
It wasn’t strange for people to visit, but she was always wary as a spy. She unlatched the lock and opened the door— and a familiar dark-haired youth with his hand raised appeared before her.
「Hi～」
「Huh?」
It happened so suddenly that Patrenshina couldn’t tell his intention. He probably noticed that she had just gotten up, and raised both hands apologetically.
「Oh, you just woke up? Sorry, I will come back later.」
「Ah— I-It’s fine! Erm, please wait five minutes, I will get myself ready!」
She closed the door with that and quickly scanned around her… Things that would be problematic if seen were kept away, and the room was tidy enough that it wouldn’t hurt Haro’s reputation. Patrenshina judged that it would be fine for him to enter, and opened the door.
「S-Sorry for the wait, please come in...」
「Yes, pardon my intrusion.」
With her permission, the youth took off his shoes and entered. 「Whoa～」 Ikuta came into her quarters that doubles as her living room, and sighed at the sight of the stuff animals everywhere.
「What a lively room. Dolls and stuff animals… amazing, you made so many.」
「Yes— Huh? 一you can tell they are made by me?」
Patrenshina was a little surprised and asked. Haro was confident in her nimble hands, and took pride in that the dolls she made were as good as those on sale outside.
「I would occasionally see you making plushies in the dorm’s drawing room. You would keep them whenever we came, so it isn’t obvious. Like that one, you made that shortly after you enlisted, right?」
Ikuta said as he picked up a sloth with long limbs. Patrenshina searched through Haro’s memories and answered with a faint smile.
「It’s fine to tell you since you already know. That plushie… its design is based on you.」
「Huh? … Indeed, the lazy aura feels right at home for me.」
「The one on the right is Yatori-san, and the one between those two is Her Majesty. The two behind are Matthew-san and Torway-san. Don’t they look just like them?」
「Now you mention it, they do match their prominent features. Hmmm… So, which one is you?」
Ikuta looked at the plushies lined up intimately together and asked. However, she shook her head at that question and said.
「I’m… not in there. Ehehe. It’s too much of a hassle to make one for myself, so I got lazy.」
「I see, but we will feel lonely without you.」
Ikuta held the plushie with both hands and mimicked voice throwing. Patrenshina turned around with a laugh.
「I will make some tea. How many spoonfuls of sugar? I can afford it, so don’t be reserved.」
「Two spoons then, I’m planning to exercise quite a bit today.」
「I see. Where are you going?」
Patrenshina poured the tea from the teapot she prepared everyday into the cups, then added ice cubes made by Mia and the expensive sugar. She used a tray to move the two cups from the kitchen back to the living room, and saw the youth holding a large bouquet of flowers waiting for him gleefully.
「I’m here to ask you out on a date.」
Ikuta knelt on one knee and proffered her the flowers. Patrenshina stiffly took them, and couldn’t help asking.
「... Where did this bouquet come from?」
「It’s a secret. It’s just like you to retort that first.」
The youth answered with a wry smile and she finally realized what was wrong— that’s right, that was Haro speaking, not me
「But if it isn’t too much trouble, please go on a date with me. We haven’t spoken for two years, so spending a vacation day with me occasionally is fine, right? I will do my best to escort you.」
Ikuta invited her in a very orthodox manner with a bouquet of flowers. Patrenshina tried to guess his intentions and quickly looked down.
「I’m happy that you are asking me out. But… Is your leg fine?」
「If I can get a break from time to time, walking won’t be a problem. But I’m still a bit lame.」
「Your Field Marshal work...」
「There are priorities in all things.」
Ikuta said unreservedly. His sudden change in attitude made Patrenshina smile without needing to pretend.
「Then… I will take you up on your proposal. We are leaving right now, right?」
「Yes, the carriage is ready. I will drink my tea here, so you can take your time.」
Ikuta sat on the guest chair and entered relaxation mode. His appearance swept all boredom away, filling Patrenshina with tension and excitement.
「Please wait for me. It’s been so long since I dressed up, I will get right to it.」
She said as she walked to her closet, certain that this was a sign that he suspected her.
「Yup～! The capital sure is bustling!」
The wobbling carriage reached the capital city, and Patrenshina stretched her limbs energetically. She was very prominent even amongst the people walking on the streets.
「I heard there is an acrobatic competition at the west plaza today, so I want to visit and settle lunch at the stalls there. How does that plan sound?」
「I agree! I love streetside performances! Let’s go!」
Patrenshina accepted right away and strode forth. Careful to act just as Haro would, she remembered that Haro had never experienced this before.
「It feels so refreshing to walk in the street with Ikuta-san.」
「Yes, we seldom go out alone, and I think you are always together with the members of the Knights Corp.」
「I feel the most comfortable being together with everyone. So… When I had to be apart from everyone at night, I will feel very lonely.」
She said how Haro really felt. At this moment, she saw from the corner of her eye something that could pique Haro’s interest and stopped.
「Oh, that stall has cloth from Tasuku! Ikuta-san, can we take a look? I love their material!」
「Of course. We don’t visit the city often, so go pick the cloth you like.」
They stood before the tailor shop and browsed the various bundles of cloth on display.
「It is beautiful and smooth to the touch… This is the first time I see this kind of colour… Ikuta-san?」
Patrenshina called out confusedly. Because Ikuta was staring at each display item like an appraiser from a pawn shop.
「This is fine, that too… Yes, no problem here, the quality of the cloth here is excellent… Sorry for spoiling the mood, but I had an incident with Tasuku cloth in the past. So I can’t help checking for fakes whenever I see this material. I know, this is a bad habit.」
Ikuta muttered with a sigh. His expression stirred Haro’s memories, and she asked:
「... Was Yatori-san involved in that incident too?」
「— How did you know?」
It was his turn to be surprised. Patrenshina giggled.
「Because I have known you for so long. Ikuta-san… there are many faces you only make when you are thinking about Yatori-san.」
「Really? How troubling… I wasn’t aware until now.」
Ikuta scratched his nose bashfully. His face stimulated her mischievous side, and she got more excited as she spoke.
「Ikuta-san, do you still remember that incident? When everyone went to the Ebodolk Province...」
「you mean our visit to Matthew’s hometown? I remember the huge uproar that happened there.」
「That’s right, we found out that the local Governor was abusing his station. During our investigations, Yatori-san and I disguised ourselves as prostitutes? Her Highness help us to put make up too...」
Patrenshina said nostalgically. Ikuta thought about something and his face turned stiff.
「When you saw us dressed up— Ikuta-san, you remember what you said?」
「......」
「You must have forgotten after so long. Back then— you shouted 『I will pay!』 when you saw me, making Yatori-san and Her Highness mad, and got you chased out of the room… When you left, you quietly said something to Yatori-san.」
Patrenshina didn’t say Ikuta’s line out loud, averting her gaze. She did so to incite his emotions of unease, and dealt the fatal blow.
「Your blatant biasness hurt me so deep～」
「.........」
「What’s wrong, Ikuta-san? You are sweating bullets.」
She turned and asked with her handkerchief in hand. Ikuta who got hit hard said:.
「... This is troubling. I should prostrate before you in apology, but I’m afraid that doing so in public will embarrass you instead...」
He was hit harder than she imagined. Patrenshina smiled happily.
「Fufu! —I’m just kidding.」
She took Ikuta’s hand to make up for that. She could no longer tell whether it was Haro or she who wanted to do this.
「Besides— I can have Ikuta-san to myself just for today.」
「—Ah, that was fun!」
About four hours later, the two of them finished watching the performance at the western plaza, and strolled in the streets dyed the colour of dusk. They were heading towards the parking lot.
「I was looking forward to it since it has been ages since I saw a street performance, but they have so many tricks! As expected of the prosperous capital, the standard of the performers sure is high!」
「Yes, it was worth a watch. I’m glad that you liked it.」
Ikuta smiles at her sincere expression of joy. As he hobbled with his clutch, he raised a suggestion.
「The carriage is parked in that direction, but there is still some time before it comes to fetch us. Why don’t we rest in a quiet spot?」
「You are right. I got too excited, and want to take a breather.」
「Let’s buy a drink too. Storekeep, two juices please.」
The owner of the open air stall took the paper currency and handed two freshly made pineapple juice to Ikuta. One of his hands was holding the clutch, so he used the fingers on his other hand to pinch the two wooden cups. However—
「Ohh—」 「Ahh!」
The cups weren’t suitable to be held this way, and Ikuta’s finger slipped when he handed the beverage to Patrenshina. One of the cups fell off— and she swiftly caught it with her left hand in the nick of time.
「Nice catch! Fufu, I didn’t spill a single drop!」
「Sorry, and thanks. We have been out just half a day, and I already can’t hold things steadily.」
「Let’s find a place to sit down. That place seemed quieter—」
Ikuta pointed somewhere while Patrenshina was looking around. She saw a bench between two buildings over there. So they walked over.
「Yes, that place will do. I will dust it off… Here, I will lend you a shoulder.」
「Thank you. Compared to just walking, sitting and standing up is tougher for me.」
「I thought so. Don’t hesitate to call me for help, I’m the only medic of the Knights Corp after all!」
They chatted as they rested on the bench and sipped on the sweet and sour juice.
「......」「——」
A strange silence fell over them at that point. Unlike the happy mood earlier, there was tension in their silence.
After staying quiet for a few minutes, it was clear that this wasn’t a depressing silence with nothing else to say, but one with deep meaning.
— It’s finally starting.
Patrenshina realized that both of them felt the same way, and were bracing themselves mentally for the upcoming conversation.
「...Hey, Haro. What are your views on the human mind?」
The first attack came from Ikuta. She answered the vague question with an equally vague answer:
「Heart? What a difficult question. It can’t be perceived by the eye and is easily hurt… That’s my impression of it.」
She didn’t think too deeply about that answer, but Ikuta unexpectedly nodded in agreement.
「Since the mind can be hurt, it can also be hurt badly. It can be crushed, shattered— or break into two.」
Patrenshina jumped in her heart. Ikuta beside her continued:
「My teacher, Professor Anarai, is very interested in such mental abnormalities, and even conducted studies. He used his network of students to collect such mental cases, and noticed a phenomenon in the data they were collecting.」
「... Phenomenon?」
Ikuta stared at his beverage and nodded.
「Correct. And that’s demonic possession.」
The unexpected term made Patrenshina open her eyes wide.
「This refers to a condition where someone becomes completely different. They suspect a demon had possessed them and replaced the mind of that person, thus the term demonic possession.」
Ikuta moistened his lips with juice and continued:
「The patient reports directly attribute the reason as demonic possession, but still searched for the causes from the patient themselves and their heritage. For example, for someone who is always jealous and violates religious teachings, the root cause will be diagnosed as an ancestor trying to harm a priest. They think evil spirits will possess such unclean people… This is just a simple explanation, the concept of evil spirits are more complicated in Aldera Theology.」
「......」
「Anyway, we Scientists are very picky about the research methods. The cases varied in seriousness, but most of them have been jealous of others or violated religious teachings. Using these common elements as the root cause is as good as saying 『People with this disease all drink water, so the root cause of the illness is water』. Before seeing the proof for this, the hypothesis itself is very hollow. As for patient’s ancestors harming priests in secret, this is dubious for most of the cases.
In the first place, making evil spirits, something that can’t be perceived as the root cause is a terrible decision in research. They should look at other possibilities, and only use this method when they had all been investigated thoroughly with no results. Hence— we view Demonic Possession as a mental illness, and not the misdeeds of evil spirits.」
Ikuta stopped here, which gave Patrenshina a feeling— his next words would touch on the heart of the topic.
「During our research, the concept of 『Multiple Personality Disorder』 was raised.」
Feeling her heart starting to race, she continued listening.
「The hypothesis is that a strong mental blow or daily suppression of emotions might cause the mind to split, literally shattering the mind. Each shard then acts independently, and appears to be a different person to others— This is the theory we invented to explain the truth behind Demonic Possession.」
「......」
「To prove our theory, we investigated the environment of the patients with Demonic Possession before their ailment, and noticed that most of them lived in unique and mentally unsanitary conditions, such as abuse, overwork or neglect. When I read the data on the patients, I thought— people living under such conditions for a prolonged period didn’t need the evil spirits to act, they would lose their mind naturally.」
Ikuta said with a sigh, then took another sip of juice. He didn’t need to say all that, Patrenshina knew that was exactly the case. Because that was her experience.
「However, I have my doubts on using 『Multiple Personality Disorder』 to replace 『Demonic Possession』. First of all, is 『Multiple Personality Disorder』 really an illness?」
Ikuta was talking about something really complicated. Patrenshina listened carefully.
「I think being mentally healthy in the eyes of society— such as being kind, is a learned behaviour. More accurately speaking, for someone to know righteousness, an environment where being righteous is meaningful has to exist. Let me put it another way, in an environment where being kind will kill you, you won’t be able to nurture kindness. For example, if there are three breads and ten starving mouths, sharing it with everyone will lead to your death, so you have to steal someone’s bread to survive— this isn’t something education or ethics can interfere with, life will sort things out directly.」
At this moment, Kusu poked his head out of the pouch. Ikuta caressed its cheek gently with his fingertips.
「There are exceptions like Sprites, which we won’t touch on for now. Back on topic— let’s say there’s a girl who developed mentally according to her environment. A warm and gentle environment made her a good girl, while a harsh environment made her a child with a twisted nature… This is too simple of an assumption. The development of the human mind isn’t that simple.」
「... Indeed.」
「But for convenience sake, we need to allow some simplification… So, what kind of environment will cause a split in personality? This includes some speculations— but it should be a drastic change to that person’s environment, a change so drastic that her personality couldn’t cope. For example, what will happen if you left a girl living a normal life left into a world of violence? No one had hit her the day before, so it will be hard for her to adjust. Just like clay molded into the shape of an apple can’t suddenly changed into the shape of a grape.」
What happened was just like he described, she thought. This was how she was created.
「Surrounded by threats, there wasn’t any time to slowly adjust, but she still wants to survive— I think the subconscious will make a decision to create a different and independent persona.」
「......」
「If that was the case, this isn’t an illness, but a survival strategy. No matter how society thinks about it, it doesn’t change the fact she had to change this way to survive. A condition that saved her instead of endangering her— I can’t call that an illness. It shouldn’t be considered an ailment.」
He stopped there. Patrenshina slowly turned to the youth.
「... This is an interesting topic. But why are you telling me all this?」
「I never thought Major Yuguni is a spy from the very start.」
Ikuta was seemingly ignoring her question, but was actually answering right to the point. But saying this didn’t bring any joy to the youth. He continued with a bitter face.
「I can’t imagine someone competent enough to infiltrate so deep into the army will make a mistake in such a situation because of anxiety and carelessness. That is a fake setup designed to pacify me alone. The traitor has been caught with your plan, so you can relax now— the intention was very obvious.」
In her heart, Patrenshina’s expression cramped. You are the only one who can see through that— She thought.
「The moment we met again, I felt something was a little wrong. The person before me was slightly different from the person I knew— And of course, this minute difference can be explained as the result of two years passing.」
「.........」
「However, I can’t ignore the sense of wrongness. No, I can’t do it. Because— I feel guilty towards you.」
「... Guilty?」
Not expecting those words, Patrenshina parroted him. Ikuta couldn’t look her in the eye and said with a heavy tone.
「I didn’t face you properly.」
At this moment, she felt a sharp pain in her chest. This pain was how Haro felt when she heard that.
「Yatori and I faced each other sincerely till the end. I shamelessly interjected into Torway’s struggles, and have always watched Matthew’s efforts from the very start. And now, I’m trying to accept Chamille’s dark side in my own way… And compared to them, my understanding towards Haro— towards you are too shallow.」
「...... That’s...」
「You left a great first impression on me. You are calm, gentle, and soothes the mood just with your presence. You have always been an indispensable part of the Knights Corp, and I’m really glad that you are still smiling like always… That must be true during my absence for the past two years. The Princess, Matthew and Torway— It’s all thanks to your mediation that they can maintain their relationship.」
Torn between feelings of gratitude and self-loath, Ikuta bit his lips and hung his head sullenly.
「Because of the serious and complicated problems our comrades have, I can feel at ease because you are here. I was sure that you didn’t have any issues— No, I was hoping that to be true. Yatori’s circumstances, Torway’s circumstances, Matthew’s circumstances, Chamille’s circumstances, my subordinate’s circumstances… Back then, my mind was thinking about all this and couldn’t handle more… And I foolishly neglected to seriously think about your circumstances.」
The wooden cup in Ikuta’s hand was creaking from his grip. However, Patrenshina smiled brightly at the youth who was blaming himself.
「— It’s fine. Like Ikuta-san said, I don’t have any serious issues, that’s why I’m so optimistic and cheery. If my attitude can help everyone— then please don’t hold back, you can come to me in the future too. That will make me happier than not being of any use.」
She rejected his concern with gentle words, telling him that his worries were pointless. However, Ikuta wasn’t stupid enough to take her literally. His eyes still downcast, he finished his juice and set the cup aside.
「... Hey, Haro. To be honest, I want to trust my comrades at all times.」
「......」
「But the word trust is delicate, and its value might plummet depending on the way it is used. For example— a foolish man who never pays attention to another’s deepest thoughts, and even avoids that person. If that man knew that and still claims to “trust” that person, that isn’t trust, but just him giving up on thinking.」
This is something I won’t do to my comrades, Ikuta added. A feeling that surpassed pain swirling in her chest made Patrenshina gasp for breath.
「... Back to the earlier topic, Multiple Personality Disorder— people with this disorder have several common symptoms. One of it is the difference in demeanour when their persona changes. Like a woman speaking a language different from the original persona; A man who hates exercising suddenly running 10km daily. But I don’t think it’s the change in persona that causes this change, but the opposite— it’s the change in demeanour that switches the persona. This is a sort of trigger that makes the subjects believe they are a different independent persona from the original— and that is the difference between simple acting and Multiple Personality Disorder.
Acting is a performance for others, but the actions by someone with Multiple Personality Disorder is done primary for themselves. They have to firmly believe that they have changed into a completely different person. This isn’t something that anyone can achieve through hard work— I think this is a sort of talent.」
「......」
「Switching some features from one extreme to another is a common activation trigger. For example, a quiet person becomes talkative, someone who dislikes alcohol starts to drink like a whale, etc. Or maybe— in extreme cases, a right handed person becoming left handed.」
The youth cast his gaze on the hands of the woman sitting beside him.
「From what I know, Haro, you are right handed. But when my beverage was falling, you caught it with your left hand… Even though your right hand is closer to the drinks.」
「......」
「Because you are left handed right now. Even if you pretend your dominant hand is your right hand, you will still reach the other hand out on reflex. That is probably your trigger condition, so you can’t conceal it with acting— No, this is the only thing you can’t hide completely. Your dominant hand being different from Haro is proof that you are a different persona.」
What amazing observation skills. Patrenshina thought as she tried to refute him.
「That’s too whimsical of an evidence, Ikuta-san. I’m a medic, you know? Cutting and mending wounds are my specialty, so the fingers on both of my hands are trained to be equally nimble. I’m very close to being ambidextrous. It’s not surprising for me to reach my left hand out on reflex.」
Ikuta didn’t refute her excuse. At this moment, she realized— the youth was capable of refuting, but saw no point in doing so. He wasn’t just using the vague proof of her dominant hand to question her identity. He still had a stronger hand to play.
「Right now, I can’t say I believe you… However, I have still been observing you, and there are things that made me convinced about that.」
As if to show that he wouldn’t back down, Ikuta said with a firm conviction in his eyes.
「Haro and us spent a lot of time together, and fought for survival on the battlefield alongside everyone. During that time, there isn’t any falsehood in her feelings. There’s no need to list examples, the time the Knights Corp spent together is the best evidence… I’m still not sure about the true identity of that malice in your heart. However, the kindness in your heart really does exist.
That’s how I arrived at the seemingly illogical conclusion of different personas. The kindness and malice in your heart should both exist at the same time, and would usually be mixed together to form a grey area. However, the dark and white sides in your mind are separate. Base on all the facts on hand— I won’t be convinced of any other answers.」
Patrenshina gritted her teeth in her heart— She couldn’t admit it. She would never accept that the youth arrived at the truth through such a thought process.
Because the kindness in Haro truly exists, so he searched for the possibility that her malice existed independently at the same time? This subjective way of thinking was too far off the mark, and violated the rules of objectively reasoning of the Science he worship so much.
「You are being too stubborn, Ikuta-san. Multiple Personality Disorder, left dominant hand and all that— there’s no need to think too hard about all this. There isn’t any malice in my heart, that’s the conclusion from the start.」
She had to admit that if there was something that could defeat her as a spy, it would be cold rational thinking. If he didn’t display such merciless thoughts, she would never concede.
「... You want to end it, right?」
Ikuta realized what she was saying, realized that was the final line that she wouldn’t budge from.
「Then let me end it for you.」
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