Saturday, November 14, 2015


Part 3

“What do you mean conscripted? I don’t even live here!”

John protested, but the official looked at him with blank eyes.

“It’s the law, everyone of age without disabilities get conscripted.”

“But I just got here! I don’t even know anyone here!”

The official chuckled and looked at his clipboard.

“John Cena right? I’m Hallhagan. There, you know me and I know you, so move along.”

“It’s John Sene, Mr Hulk Hogan! I’m just here to drop this lost girl I found, and I will be on my way!”

The official looked up from his clipboard and said with a serious expression.

“You know how many wars I have fought? Nine. My team and I fought nine wars and plenty of extra skirmishes as militias. Volunteers. Now that an actual paid army is ready to take over, I can stand down. I contributed in nine wars after all, you understand how hard it is to fight in even one war? No, you just stand at the sidelines and watch, thinking war is cool, and even enjoy the spectacle.”

Taking a deep breath, the official prepared to rant on.

“There are seven billion people in this world, so why am I the only one obliged to fight any more wars? I already fought in nine, and what do the people call me? They call me a faggot for not fighting anymore. That’s right, fight nine wars and people call you a faggot, what’s the point? I fought for them, free of charge, and they don’t see me as a man who completed nine campaigns, but as someone who drop out! How thick skinned are they? There are seven billion people in the world, someone else will take over if it is so important!”

Hallhagen finished his rant and walked off. John was pretty sure he went off topic somewhere, but decided it was not worth the effort to pursue the matter.


“Calling him a faggot is not nice, Baird. Let’s find my mom for now.

♦ ♦ ♦

After thwarting the assassination attempt, John and his group decided to approach the army of Meitogear and was welcomed into the fort. Baird was sort of a celebrity that everyone knew, so John thought they got a pass because of that. Turns out they were just conscripting any random people who dare wander in. Unlike Dominaria who were all Caucasians, Outerhaven had people of all races, and even accommodated John who looked Caucasian.

“The guys who took my truck are kind of buff and short though.”

“You mean the Dwarves? They spend a lot of time tinkering around with gadgets, so it would be fine. This way, it’s not far now.”

John followed behind Jasmine who led the way as he looked at his conscription orders. He was given the rank of Lance Corporal and had to report to the transport branch as a driver with his vehicle, Private Jasmine and Lieutenant Baird. Dominaria would be attacking the fort with their army soon.


Jasmine yelled and ran towards someone.

She was a woman who looked no older than 20, but Jasmine was calling her mother. John was really confused by the age and appearance of Asian ladies.

After a heartwarming meeting, the lady turned towards John and Baird.

“Sir Bearington, Mr John, thanking for taking care of my daughter. I am Dnyce Nine, a dance instructor.”

Jasmine’s last name is Nine? She never told me that.

“Dancing huh, something I don’t think I can do well, ”

“If you have some time to spare, I could teach you some moves.”

“Erm, no you see, dancing is considered… unmanly by my friends…”

Dnyce scoffed at the idea.

“You do know what the Exemplary Hatless Men would say about this?”


“We can dance if we want to, we can leave your friends behind. Cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance, well they're no friends of mine.”


“You have been conscripted too, Sir Bearington? Do come in and take a seat. And Jasmine, change into some proper clothes. I told you not to hang out with those horny dog faced friends of yours who are into men who can’t speak English.”

“But Mom…”

“Just go to your room young lady. This way, Mr John.”

♦ ♦ ♦

After resting for a couple of hours, we reported for conscript duties. I couldn’t run away because they have my truck, and it didn’t felt right to desert Baird and Jasmine. Dnyce was the commander of the dance Corp, which had the important role of motivating the troops and increasing their survivability.

According to Dnyce, dancing hypes the soldiers and makes them harder, improving morale and defence. I agreed with her, just seeing her in dance costume made me want to work harder too. She was cool and definitely a MILF (Mother I Like as a Friend).

"By the way, where is your dad, Jasmine?"

Jasmine had a complicated expression, then she said

"My father is sort of famous. He is serving in the army in the North right now. They call him 'The Rock'."

John wondered what kind of man he was. A silent and steady type? Machine like in attitude like a gollem? Probably a reserved military man who will say something like 'I'm not an interesting guy'.

♦ ♦ ♦

John’s mind went blank when he arrived at the transport branch.

“What did you do to my truck?”

John asked in awe. His vehicle had became a monster truck now.

The damaged front of the truck was outfitted with a metallic drill like cone jutting three meters out, the windows had metal grids protecting it, and blunt blades jutted two meters from either side, with spare blades rested on top of the canopy.

“We added in armour onto your horseless carriage of course. It won’t last long with the thin armour it has.”

John looked at his revamped truck for a moment. He might as well go all out.

Taking his keys out of his pocket, he opened the trailer and gestured to the Dwarves.

“Help me unload these stuff. I can fit in some elite forces here and deliver them right into the heart of the enemy. Baird, can you get me an audience with the general? I would like to propose a plan to him.”



  1. i have no idea what i just read?

  2. That's a subtle �� ���� �� you have there

  3. Why wrestling references I'm just wondering? Is it because the frequency of them appearing in movies has increased?

  4. we need more cena and truck-san

  5. Dude truck-chan has transformed into a Deceptic*n.

  6. i got no idea of what i just read? someone mind exlaining it for me?? :))

  7. i got no idea of what i just read? someone mind exlaining it for me?? :))

  8. I fcking lose it at Mother I like as a friend

  9. Thanks for the update, the writing quality has risen quite a lot.

  10. Am I the only person who got the safety dance reference? Didn't get anything else tho :P

    1. I did not get the safety dance reference as I grow up in South-East Asia. Googling the lyrics solved the mystery for me.

      Exemplary Hatless Men -> Men without hats


  12. Looks like some strings are about to get kekked

  13. Say, we can go where we want to
    A place where they will never find
    And we can act like we come from out of this world
    Leave the real one far behind